The Roller Girls of Connecticut

When the daughters of the American derby revolution amass together, diverse crowds of adults and children gather and cheer as one. Such was the case on Saturday March 14th when the Connecticut Roller Girls mixed up their ranks into two unique teams. The St. Patrick’s cereal themed bout put the Lucky Charms versus the Cap’n Crunchers.

As our group gathered we looked at the rosters for each team and made our predictions.

The Lucky Charms
Black Cherry
Ether Bunny
C. Mya Rage
Liberty Violence
Pam Terror
Parker Poison
Paula G. Imnaughty
Mona Mour (visiting from the Boston Derby Dames)

The Cap’n Crunch
Pearl Jammer
Violet Riot
Anita Guiness
Eleanor Bruisevelt
Flora Goodthyme
Luciana Pulverotti
Milla LowLife
Miz Con SepJen
Ivonna Shankabitch (visiting from the Boston Derby Dames)
Vicious Stylz (visiting from Providence Roller Derby)

I anticipated a win for Lucky Charms. Cap’n Crunch had an extremely strong Jamming team but the Charms seemed to have an equally powerful collection of pivots and blockers. Put Parker, Revengela, and Paula into the pack with Cherry or Ether as their pivot and no skater is safe. What I wasn’t anticipating was the powerful duo of Milla and Looch for the Crunchers.

With gold sequenced booty shorts and green shirts, the Lucky Charms came to the line. Doomcake would start as their jammer. Meanwhile the Cap’n Crunchers rolled up in blue tops with large gold buttons in the style of their cereal mascot. For the Charms, Pearl Jammer wore the star on her helmet.

As the bout started the cowbells rang and the crowd cheered. Pearl and Doom took off. Flora Goodthyme started the bout right with a nice clean hit on Doomcake. Doom dropped back just enough for Pearl to whip through and pull four points for her team. What followed was somewhat unexpected. Both teams started cycling through jammers.

For the Charms, Doom was followed by Pam, Black Cherry, Rage, Revengela and Mona. Meanwhile the Crunchers saw 8 different jammers before any girl put on the star for the second time. Pearl, Elle, Milla, Anita, Flora, Ivonna, and Miz all skated as jammer. The teams seemed to be conserving the strength of their jammers by rotating positions regularly early in the game. The result was a low scoring, highly defensive first half of the first period. The Lucky Charms were consistently getting lead jammer status (6 of the first 7 jams), but the Crunchers’ defense was keeping them honest. The score broke free when Pearl and Doom retook their positions as jammers. The whistles blew. Looch was acting as the pivot for the Crunchers, Parker as the pivot for the Charms. Doomcake got in front quickly, but with great skill Looch kept just in front of her. The short delay was enough for Pearl to break free and take lead jammer status. Pearl capitalized on her opportunity and pulled in an impressive 9 points before the jam concluded.

Cap’n Crunch continued their cycling of jammers and put Vicious in next against Black Cherry. The defense for the Crunchers held Cherry back, but Vicious took a nasty beating. First Pam and Paula G. Imnaughty came at her on a turn. One after another they slammed their shoulders into Vicious, knocking her down and off the track. She got back up only to feel the wrath of Black cherry and Pam. Again she was dropped to her knees. She got up once more and on the next pass Black Cherry plowed into her yet again. From the stands it seemed like Vicious’s skates left the floor on her way down. Let no one say these girls don’t put it all on the line.

Miz exacted revenge for her teammate in the next few jams. She knocked down Mona first, and then just seconds later landed a blow on Pam Terror. The Charms just couldn’t find their rhythm – testimony to the impressive work of the Crunchers’ pack.

The first half ended with a score of 10 for the Lucky Charms and 31 for the Cap’n Crunchers.

During intermission we were entertained by a small Irish band that kept the feeling light in this week of St. Patty’s day.

The last jam of the first half had ended with a trip to the penalty box for Elle. But Elle wasted no time. Entering the jam late she sprinted through the pack and grabbed lead jammer status. Interestingly, penalty box jammers seem to pull lead jamming status somewhat regularly. I’ll have to take a closer look at the data for the next few bouts, but it would seem that the opposing pack may not have a defensive mindset at the start of such jams. The result is a definitive chance for a late entering jammer to sweep through the pack unopposed. It’s certainly not worth the scoreless time in the penalty box, but it’s an interesting phenomenon nonetheless.

The start of the second half pushed the Crunchers further ahead. Elle, Pearl, and Milla collectively amassed 33 points in the first 7 jams after the intermission bringing the score to 64 – 16. But that was the end of the points for the girls in blue. The rally for the Lucky Charms began with two consecutive slams on Anita. Parker Poison took the first shot, and Black Cherry the second. Black Cherry’s hunger for blows was not subsided however, and she took it out on Ivonna in the next jam with another huge hit.

The Charms began their rally. Pam and Rage alternated jammer status deep into the second half. They were far behind and needed to cover a lot of ground, but it wasn’t an impossible task. With Ether and Cherry alternating as pivot, Rage and Pam got to work. Rage took advantage of Cherry’s hit on Ivonna and scored 8 for her team. Pam took three, Rage another 5, and Pam 5 more. But the seconds were ticking away. Despite their last push, the final score favored the Cap’n Crunchers 64 to 39.

Mike D’s top five hits of the night!
5. Late in the second half, Doomcake barreled through Violet Riot, giving Pam an opportunity for a grand slam.
4. Black Cherry drops her shoulder and, moments later, drops Anita
3. Pam and Paula’s double team of Vicious in the first half
2. Black Cherry sends Vicious into orbit
1. Luciana Pulverotti’s beautiful blocking of Doomcake in the first half, providing a 9 point opportunity for Pearl

The bout was awesome. I have developed a great respect for the defensive side of roller derby. It’s so exciting to see the strategies and the communication between skaters out in the pack. I would imagine that performing both defensively and offensively is no easy task, on wheels no less! Great job to all the players, it’s a joy to watch you skate.


Lead Scorers!
Lucky Charms
Pearl Jammer: 30 points and a perfect record. 6 jams, 6 leads.
Elleanor Bruisevelt: 19 points. 5 jams, 4 lead

Cap’N Crunchers
C. Mya Rage: 19 points. 6 jams, 5 lead
Pam Terror: 12 points. 8 jams, 5 lead

Total Leads
17 Lucky Charms
16 Cap’N Crunchers

Interestingly, lead jammer status was almost perfectly split between the teams. In fact, the Charms had one more than the Crunchers. This wasn’t a bout of getting up front, it was a bout that was about capitalization of opportunity.

Penalty Box:
No one skater visited the box an uncommon number of times in this bout.

Lucky Charms: Black Cherry
Cap’N Crunchers: Luciana Pulverotti

Well deserved!

The next bout will be on April 11th. For more information check out the roller girl website here.

3 thoughts on “The Roller Girls of Connecticut

  • 3/19/2009 at 10:20 pm

    YAY! ConSepJen finally won a mixmatch!!!!! Unfortunately I had to work Saturday night. Hopefully I’ll be @ the next bout(Bunnies vs. Chicks I’ll presume)

    The Original GGRDonald
    Pearl Jammer-The Original Lucky Charm ;-)

  • 3/23/2009 at 12:51 pm

    Sorry Donald, its Pop Tarts vs Iron Maidens!

  • 4/2/2009 at 9:16 pm

    given that fact that Easter is the next day, Peeps versus Bunnies would make more sense.

    The Original GGRDonald
    Bubblegum versus Heavy Metal?


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