On Friday night Connecticut’s daughters of the derby revolution came together at the CT Sports Center to face up against their first international opponent: Montreal’s New Skids on the Block. Unlike their most recent bouts, which have focused on CT’s secondary team the Yankee Brutals, this match-up would require the furious skating skills of CT’s elite: The Stepford Sabotage. With their matching pink and green uniforms, the Connecticut girls presented themselves as a force to be reckoned with.
Let’s take at look at the line up for the home team
Luciana Pulverotti 110R (Captain)
Eleanor Bruisevelt 33 (Assistant Captain)
Black Cherry C-4
Chelsea Grin 777
C. Mya Rage 86’d
Doomcake 13
Ether Bunny 2KO
Girl Fawkes 5NOV
Milla Lowlife 40oz.
Miz ConsepJen 7
Murphy’s OUTLAW 15
Parker Poison 3
Pearl Jammer GO
Pepper Grind-Her 10
Revengela 1-2-3-4
Violet Riot 911
Montreal’s The New Skids on the Block, dressed in black, had driven for 8 hours for a weekend of derby. Their match with CT was the first of three, the second on Saturday against Washington DC, the last against New York’s Suburbia.
Cheese Grater 289
No Holds Bard 2X4
Lyn-dah Kicks 75
Beater Pan-Tease 1976
Trash N’ Smash 118
Romeo 222
Wrath Poutine 30
Georgia W. Tush 40
Lady J 88
Rae Volver 39
Smack Daddy 3X
Bone Machine 1111
Izzy Skellington 182
Jess Bandit 8
Iron Wench 516
Lil Mama 12
Ewan Wotarmy 7734
Beals on Wheels 89
Karla Shnikov AK47
Nameless Whorror 202
After introductions, the girls skated up to their starting positions. The first jam saw Chelsea Grin facing Iron Wench at the jammer line. The girls stood posed for speed, but at the first whistle the pace proceeded at an unusually slow clip. It appeared that Montreal was purposefully limiting the speed of the pack to give their fastest jammer the greatest opportunity to pull points.
The unexpected strategy seemed to catch the girls in green off guard. Iron Wench quickly sped through the pack getting lead jammer status and circled through the pack twice scoring nine points for her team before Chelsea could recover from an early hit by Canadian Nameless Whorror.
Eleanor Bruisevelt faced Ewan Wotarmy next and pulled in eight points for the Sabotage after Ewan found herself sent to the penalty box for cutting the track.
Stepford’s momentum was a bit erratic at the start. In part, their drive seemed to falter each time Iron Wench had the star on her helmet. Iron Wench followed her nine point first jam with fifteen points in her second and thirteen more in her fourth. Black Cherry and Pearl each stole lead jamming status from Iron Wench once during the first half (Pearl off a beautiful whip by Miz ConsepJen,) but Iron Wench still pulled in 49 points in the first half. Forty Nine Points!
At half time the score was 78 to 40 with the New Skids on the Block in the lead. The girls from Montreal were proficiently keeping our jammers away from the lead jammer position. In the first half, the New Skids were awarded lead jamming status for 11 jams compared to just 8 for the Stepford.
The crowd had not given up on the hometown girls as they returned for the second half to fight back against the visitors. Eleanor brought some life to Connecticut after she returned from a penalty with a vengeance to outskate Ewan Wotarmy 14 to 10 in the fourth jam.
Next up, Milla LowLife maintained Stepford’s momentum against Georgia W. Tush. She sprinted off the starting line holding hard along the inside of the track. Her speed let her sneak through the pack to quickly secure lead jamming status. She followed with two more laps, scoring eight unopposed points for Stepford.
The New Skids on the Block, however, were not to be outperformed. Iron Wench and Ewan Wotarmy followed with seven and six point jams respectively. The Connecticut blockers did their best to limit the damage, but the points continued to accumulate for Montreal.
The packs were playing especially hard in this bout. Collectively between the two teams, this bout saw 69 trips to the penalty box. All of the girls were taking a serious beating on the track. Their ability to keep skating hard after such jarring blows stands as testimony to their hard training.
As the final jam came to a close, the score showed the visitors ahead 151 to 93. This was a brutal bout that showcased the passion these women have for their sport.
Statistics!!
Lead Scorers:
The New Skids on the Block
Iron Wench 77pts (9 leads in 13 jams)
Ewan Wotarmy 32pts (5 leads in 7 jams)
Georgia W. Tush 19pts (5 leads in 9 jams)
The Stepford Sabotage
Milla LowLife 39pts (5 leads in 9 jams)
Eleanor Bruisevelt 34pts (2 lead in 9 jams)
Black Cherry 13pts (3 lead in 5 jams)
Penalty Queens:
The New Skids on the Block
Ewan Wotarmy: 6 Trips
The Stepford Sabotage
Chelsea Grin: 6 Trips
MVPs!
Iron Wench
Luciana Pulverotti
Special thanks to all those who help make these bouts a truly entertaining experience. Special kudos to the organizers, the refs, and the CT Roller Derby sponsors. If you’d like to learn more about roller derby I encourage you to visit the CTRG website located here.