I just got word that a loved one inadvertently blended their fingers in a blender. Gah!! Absolutely horrific!! Thankfully this individual escaped virtually unscathed – one trip to the ER and 7 stitches later and all is mostly well. Here was my e-mail to that individual: (The names have been changed to protect the guilty.)

Dear Friend,

I am so happy that you’re safe. I was quite shaken by your grating, horrific, story. What a crushingly scary event! It’s pureely awful. Your pulse must have been racing. Friend… You really threw the dice taking a chance cleaning it while it was plugged in. Don’t mince words, it must have hurt a lot!! I’m glad you didn’t beat around the bush in your decision to go to the ER. If you hadn’t, you’d be whipping yourself about it later. I’m a bit mixed about this. I’m half worried and half angry. What the frappe were you thinking? Your crafting hobbies could have ground to a halt.

I’m just glad you’re safe. Rest up. Keep yourself liquified. Blend some relaxation in with your busy schedule. Hopefully things will be smoothie sailing from here.

Mike D.

bwa ha ha

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