In general I tend to be a keep-to-myself kind of airline passenger. I take the window seat, almost never use the airplane restroom, and preoccupy myself with very independent activities like reading or napping.
On yesterday’s trip home from Charleston, however, I sat next to two extraordinary people.
person the first: exceptionally cute African studies college chick eager to talk to Mike D.
person the second: Mayonnaise Salesman.
Can you believe it? A mayonnaise salesman!! I had all sorts of questions to ask this man. Admittedly, I didn’t even know there were salesmen for consumer products as standard as mayonnaise, but apparently the wars are less for shelf space and more for the store brands. This particular man worked for Cains, a brand that I don’t frequent – but that does supply the mayonnaise for Stop and Shop and Big Y brands.
What’s different between the store brand and the brand name? Actually, quite a bit. It’s a different recipe. Apparently Cains has a slightly more citrus tang as they use higher lemon content instead of preservatives. The store brands have a recipe that more closely follows Hellmann’s mayonnaise with its more eggy flavor.
I also got an abridged history of John Cains and Henry Smith, the founders of Cains.
What a great flight.
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JEALOUS! oh man! Why did you not have him call me!
WICKED jealous. The only person I’ve ever talked to on a plane was some old lady who claimed to know about my hometown (Orange, MA) because there are hot air balloon shows there. The only problem is… there are no hot air balloon shows in Orange.
But did the african studies girl care about the mayonnaise?
Well, she was on my first connection while the mayonnaise man was on the second. She and I chatted about books. you know, if I’d mentioned mayonnaise I probably would have got her number.
If you had sat next to a Miracle Whip salesman, I would have been REALLY psyched.
I’m not sure what it says about you that between the words “two extraordinary people” and “What a great flight”, you dedicated a full 146 words to a dude and mayonnaise, and 15 words to an “exceptionally” cute girl eager to talk to you. For shame Mike D.
This explains A LOT.
We buy Cains mayonnaise, because it does not contain High Fructose Corn Syrup and Hellman’s does.
You are stupid. Who wants citrus, and by extension Fruit, and by a further extension Healthy Food, in their Mayo? Stupid People, thats who. And you are one of them. A stupid Person = Ryan Schenk.
Hellman’s does not contain high fructose corn syrup.
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