Insomnia explained

March 20th. 12:40am. Mike D sits drearily in bed bathed in the light from his computer monitor. The room is otherwise dark.

Ryan: MIKE D! What are you doing up so late?!
Mike D: I can’t sleep
Ryan: aw man, that happens to me sometimes. Sometimes I get all worked up about how I’m not sleeping, and it just makes me not sleep even more.
Mike D: Yeah, that’s usually what happens to me too.
Ryan: Did you know that I have chronic insomnia?
Mike D: I did not know this.
Ryan: It’s true. I don’t sleep very well. I never have, since I was about 3 (according to my mom).
Mike D: I feel your pain. This stinks.
Ryan: Ruth thinks it’s my karmatic payment for being so awesome
Mike D: ha ha ha ha ha

30 min later….

Mike D: Ugh, Sarah I can’t sleep.
Sarah: aww Mike D. That stinks
Mike D: yeah. I hate it when this happens.
Sarah: Why can’t you sleep?
Mike D: I have no idea.
Sarah: Maybe it’s nature’s way of balancing the fact that you’re so awesome during the day.

And there you have it folks! Insomnia explained through two independently developed theories.

5 thoughts on “Insomnia explained

  • 3/20/2009 at 12:02 pm

    Looking at a computer screen close to/during/after your bed time will mess up your circadian rhythms. Abandon computer use about an hour before you want to sleep!!!

  • 3/20/2009 at 12:26 pm

    Sometimes I have a hard time sleeping too. But there is a cure! I keep emergency meat loaf in a drawer next to my bed. I DEFY you not to fall asleep with a belly full of meat loaf.

  • 3/20/2009 at 6:51 pm

    As an insomniac, this theory makes perfect sense to me.

  • 3/23/2009 at 11:56 am

    All this past week I thought it was my codeine for my cold that kept me up all night. Really, it’s all because I’m just awesome. Coolio.

  • 3/23/2009 at 1:38 pm

    I sleep just fine, so I suppose that says something about my lack of awesomeness.


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