While Mike D is away in Georgia rocking a presentation, I, Ryan Schenk, am coming to you live from Cape Cod with a report of the most heavy metal pumpkin carving contest this world has ever seen. Nigh a week ago, a Mr. Copeland-Will challenged yours truly to a mano-a-mano heavy metal pumpkin carving contest. He who carves the most metal pumpkin wins, he who carves the lesser metal pumpkin shall forever go down in history as an enemy of metal; that is, until next year when he is allowed to redeem his transgressions against heavy metal.
The Chaos Gourd is Mr. Copeland-Will’s entry. Inspired by Meshuggah’s Chaosphere, and carved with the blinding speed of a pearing knife blast beat, the Choas Gourd was finished in under one play-through of Napalm Death’s Peel Session. Much like the Chaosphere, the Chaos Gourd is covered with spikes, designed to mortally injure the enemies of metal, and looking shockingly like Mike D’s sisters’ (we still aren’t sure which one) flail. In this piece, the artist explores the dialectic tension between art and object, as explored by contemporaries Frank Stella and Eva Hesse, but not in a heavy metal context. Plus, it could probably injure you. Badly.
The Metal-o-Lantern by Mr. Schenk, on the other hand, is a figurative work that does not explore the implications of medium-as-message or the boundaries of the canvas. However, based on Manowar’s Hell on Earth 4, and carved during a single continuous 48-hour sitting with Manowar’s Warriors of the World video on constant loop, it is truly a work of epic heavy metal. And as an added bonus, it encouraged mothers to keep their children away from my door; I didn’t have any candy anyway, all they would have gotten was a surly demeanor.