my rents have a phone from the 70’s. it’s this yellow thing, mounted on the wall, with the rotary wheel and a long twirly cord.
It hasn’t really worked for the past 3 years.
my mother, sent out an e-mail to her children asking if we’d be devestated if they got a new phone. I replied that it’d be fine with me. The winning response goes to my sister Alicia who admitted:
“If we got a new phone I would cry endlessly for a week and wear
sackcloth and eat bitter herbs.”
that right there is pure genius.
mike d: Quinnipiac?
jill: no way. I knew someone who went there and got fat.
mike d: what about yale.
jill: (sarcastically) because their french program is great.
mike d: How about Wesleyan?
jill: ha ha, I don’t want to go to a school with a name like Wesleyan.
mike d: well, what about fairfield?
jill: no michael, no one goes there.
mike d: I have friends who go to fairfield!
jill: (sympathetically) they’re not real.
co-worker, regarding indiana: “I’d imagine it’s similar to Arkansas. You have to line up six women along the wall to get a full set of teeth.”
well, it’s official: I am going on my first business trip.
“but to where?” the ladies across america ask
No… not California, nor Vegas. not even Washington D.C.
What’s in indiana? Very little. But, I’ll be there from the 2nd through the 13th of August putting together a giant piece of machinery. two weeks!?!? I suspect that this will be very near torture. Don’t get me wrong, there will be all sorts of perks:
1. free food. And believe me, I’m going to eat like a king.
2. free laundry. I’m going to be bringing all of my dirty clothes with me.
3. frequent flyier miles.
4. discover cash back bonus becuase I purchased the tickets myself
then… there are the un-perks
1. late hours of work
2. a weekend… lost (we will be working through the weekend)
3. early mornings
I am a bit excited. But a bit nervous too. Hopefully I’ll have frequent access to internet. sigh.
I was chatting with C.B. last night and we exchanged the following words…
mike d: hey buddy, what are you doing Tuesday?
c.b -caught off guard- : … oh um, when’s… tuesday?
I really didn’t know what to say. how do you respond to a question like that?
in other news, my sister came and visited yesterday. She stayed over and made pancakes this morning for my roommate and I. It was fun.
We had EGGO syrup with it’s new ‘perfect pour no drip’ spout. Pretty ingenius I think, but I would hardly say it’s perfect, there were still the ellusive syrup strings flirting with the cap post-pour. I think that the ‘no drip maple syrup spout’ is the last true quest of the scientific community. They’ve all tried it. Aunt Jemimah moved to the raised nozzle after playing around with the side spout. EGGO uses a plastic shield with slits for the syrup to pass through when the bottle is squeezed.
The Vermont folks seem not to care, and usually just have a bottle with a standard top. But really, has Vermont ever made a scientific contribution to the world? (ben & jerrys doesn’t count).
Upon discovering the solution to this epic problem, I think the rest of humanity’s problems will naturally fall into place.
My place of work provides free coffee, tea, and water to their employees, now this is definitly a plus. But I have discovered a new way to take advantage of these free-stuffs. The solution is simple: Wherever there is free coffee, there is free milk.
For the duration of my time with this corporation, I will be eating my breakfast cereal at work.
Imagine all the free milk I will consume! And as I pour gallon upon gallon into my cereal bowl, my wallet will become thicker and thicker with all the savings. It’s like finding a free milk coupon in the sunday circular each and every week! I’d be nuts not to take advantage!
Take that corporate america!
::takes a big bite of milky Total Cereal::
The highlight of the weekend was most definitely North shore music theater’s production of Beauty & the Beast. I went to the show saturday night with my lovely girlfriend and we were both extremely impressed.
I think it’s only in town for one or two more weeks. But if you like Disney, do everything you can to attend. www.nsmt.org is the website.
We were tossin’ the disc again today. It was a bit windy.
I hit another child… this one in the head.
I don’t know what the deal is. My co-workers try to blame my throws. But I swear it’s the wind. God wants to punish those little kids, and he uses my frisbee as his means.
thankfully this little girl didn’t start crying. It was a bit of a lofty throw, and it sort of coasted into her noggin, so it wasn’t too fast. Instead of the bawling that I was expecting, she turned around and gave me an evil eye like none I have ever witnessed.
I suspect it’d be similar to the type of response you’d get from a woman if you called her fat.