This morning as I drove to work on studded snow tires, I realized I never put together that new car post I was promising. So here it is. I’d like to formally introduce you to Rod Zapa.

Rod Zapa on a dark and dreary day

Rod Zapa is my ‘new’ red 1998 Mazda Protege stick shift. I purchased it from Margo, speed skater extraordinaire.

This is my first standard vehicle. It was awhile before I stopped loathing hill starts. Each hill became a delicate game of timing as I tried to crawl towards unforgiving red lights and speed through wavering greens. When I faltered in my timing, my passenger (most often carpool buddy Shaun L.) had to endure excessive revving as I tried to compensate for my shaky clutch work. I sometimes wonder if those cars who stood idly by my side at lights thought it odd I would taunt them with my car’s throaty roar only to piddle and sputter forward once the light changed.

The car has a number of amenities that are novel to me. Most obvious perhaps is the CD player (The future is now!) Rod Zapa also has a sunroof and a temperamental Air Conditioner system (better than my previous ornamental Air Conditioner). Granted, the car runs a little louder than the Nissan and lacks some of the luxurious faux wood paneling in its interior, but its performance has been consistent and I’m pleased with the new ride.

Thanks Margo for the great car!

I had an issue with my online bill pay a few months ago. It stunk. I got late fees added to every single one of my bills because of some weird screw up. In any case, I thought I’d had it all figured out… but just today got a letter in the mail saying that my auto insurance had been canceled because of a missed payment.

Oops.

I’ve been meaning to check out Geico, so I hit up their website first and, just like that, had car insurance not 25 minutes later. What was especially convenient was that the policy starts tonight at midnight, so I won’t have any time uninsured. Neat.

Thanks Geico!

A few years back Jocelyn sold me her Nissan Altima. What a nice little car! It took some tender appreciation and a fair amount of time in a shop before it could be considered a fully operational battlestation four door sedan, but it got there and it’s been faithful for 60,000 miles.

Sadly, it’s beginning to show its age; the CV joints need replacing and there’s a vague smell of burning when you drive for more than 6 feet. It might not be anything to worry about but I figured I’d throw out the obligatory MikeDiDonato.com proclaimation: if you know anyone who’s trying to sell a car for cheap, fire me an e-mail – MikeDiDonato AT gmail D0T com.

Perhaps we can work something out. This little beast won’t last forever, so it’s probably best if I start looking at replacements now.

The other option would, of course, be to buy a smart car. Though it might be tricky to fit a bo staff into a smart car.

I had some mighty plans for Saturday that came to a grinding halt on the off ramp to 691 in Meriden. I was driving to get to the House of Rock after Kung Fu for a quick stop before turning around and heading back to Stoneham to say hello to my folks when the tachometer needle started shaking violently. UP down down UP down down UP down down UP… it shook itself to 0 and the engine stalled.

I was coasting at about 40, hit my emergency lights and touched the brakes to slow to a stop… could I make it across the street to the Shell station? … I gasped! When the car stalled I lost power brakes, but I didn’t make this connection in my head at the time of the engine stall, so when I touched the brakes I got no response. There was a mild freak out, I yanked the emergency brake, swung the wheel, and screeched to a standstill on the grass off of the highway.

I called up Shaun who helped me push the car across the street to that gas station. We tried to start the car again… to no avail. I walked into the Gas Station. There was a young Indian man behind the counter in an orange creamsicle colored shirt.

“Excuse me, my car broke down, is there a service station nearby?”
“yes actually, there’s one right on the other side of the dairy queen,” he responded pointing north “it’s about a 1 minute walk. If it’s closed, come back and I can get a friend who might be able to help you.”

Shaun and I headed over to the service station, but it was indeed closed. We walked back to the gas station and I thanked Shaun for his help and suggested that he head back home. I walked back into the service station.

“Hi, yeah… the place down the street is closed. You said you knew someone who might be able to lend me a hand?”
“Yes,” He said with a smile, “I’ll bring you to his shop. It’s just a ways down the street.”

I followed him to his car. It was a Lexus SUV.

“Wow! Nice car,” I stammered
“Thanks! It’s big, but it does the trick.”
“Do you own this gas station?”
“I do,” he responded “in fact a friend and I own a bunch of properties”
“mostly in this area?”
“actually no. All over. We have some in Michigan and New Jersey…” he went on with the list.
“That’s amazing!”
“yeah, we started about 10 years ago and now it’s about a 15 million dollar business”

Wow.

He took me over to a little shop in Meriden where I met Jose. Jose promised he’d take a look at the car. I left the keys and my new Indian friend brought me back to the shop. I picked a few things out of the car that I needed and then headed home.

I’m not sure what’s wrong with the car, hopefully nothing too expensive. But this was definitely a unique experience. I’m grateful to have ended up at this particular gas station.

My folks have a van that they are trying to pass on. They have offered me this vehicle. What better opportunity for a fun vs. funk.

Fun: Musical equipment can be easily carted around.
Funk: Expected yearly cost for insurance and taxes would be about $320
Fun: Trips to the dump become easier
Funk: Poor gas mileage
Fun: Back-up car for when the Nissan has trouble
Funk: Parking space used.
Fun: Big group climbing trips become easy

Hmm. What do you think?

90′s Acclaim

from Ben.

Tomorrow, the Acclaim to Fame will be taken to a better place. A place where the sun always shines, the gas tank is always full, and oil changes are free.

My dearest Acclaim, I salute you.

In the beginning of time the sun looked hopefully down to Earth. It saw there, amongst the creatures of earth, sea, and sky a bird so beautiful that it could be compared with none other. It was the Phoenix.

“Phoenix, you are a bird more beautiful than all others. You shall live forever.”

The Phoenix sang with joy and praised the sun. She beat her fire red wings and danced through the sky. But the world envied the bird and constantly bothered her with its problems. So the Phoenix set off, flying east towards the rising sun, until she found a quiet sacred desert where she found peace and tranquility.

Many years passed. Some say five hundred others a thousand. And the Phoenix lived on, singing and dancing for the sun. But she grew weary and tired with age. One day she sang out to the sun:

“oh glorious sun, make me young and strong yet again!”

but the sun did not hear the Phoenix’s song. So she flew west to where she was first born. It was a slow long journey because the beautiful bird was burdened with age. So along the way she collected spices of cinnamon and nestled them between her feathers and upon reaching the tree where the sun first proclaimed her immortal, the Phoenix built a mighty nest of cinnamon and leaves. She blessed the nest and found some myrrh seeping from a nearby tree from which she molded a beautiful egg. The Phoenix sat on the egg and sang out to the sun again.

“oh glorious sun, make me young and strong yet again!”

This time the sun heard, and shined down so ferociously that all the other animals had to hide from the burning rays. The clouds parted and the sea receded. But the Phoenix raised her head and bright red and yellow wings and she burst into flames.

As the sun’s harsh rays eased, the clouds returned. Then the sea. And finally the animals and life that populated the plains. They saw there a tree and nest that had not been touched with fire. A perfect pile of silver ashes lay within the nest. And soon those ashes began to tremble. A Phoenix quietly pushed her way out from deep within those ashes. The Phoenix grew and spread her wings and sang out in praise of the sun.

She then found the egg of myrrh, now hollow, and carried it to a temple where she honored the bright sun.

Once the ritual was complete, the Phoenix returned to the quiet desert and found peace once again.

My friends, I present to you The Phoenix:

“The phoenix hope, can wing her way through the desert skies, and still defying fortune’s spite; revive from ashes and rise.”
-Miguel de Cervantes Saavedra

I really want to give up the internet. I want to rid myself of DrMcNinja.com and cnn and heaps of wasted hours on YouTube.

Unfortunately, I really like having this website. So I fear that I’m at least partially stuck. There’s a little bit of irony in there somewhere, but I can’t quite put my finger on it.

In order to aid me in my anti-internet quest, I think I’m going to remove the computer from my bedroom proper and place it back in the huddles of my closet. Then, I will attempt to only use common room computers on a daily basis at the House of Rock. Perhaps I’ll make the big move tonight.

Other news:
Someone we all know and love may be coming back into our lives very very soon… that’s all I can say for now. Stay tuned for more exciting information.

I’m a slow driver. I try to stay around 60 on the highway and around 40 on sub-highway roads. I also accelerate slowly. One might call it a crawl. I’m taking data to see how many miles per gallon I can get. This last fill up I hit 34 mpg in the Nissan Ultima and it felt great!

The down side of this is that the world hates me.

And when I say “hate” I mean “hate“. I don’t think a day passes when I don’t get scowls, horns, gestures, or harsh words. As I see it, there are three types of honks. 1) the ‘Lookout! my car is here!’ 2) the ‘just thought I’d let you know the light has turned green… in case you got distracted’ and 3) the ‘I hate you because you’re in my way’

1 and 2 are usually pretty well recieved. It’s 3 that’s a kicker. Why the hatred folks? I mean you no harm. What I’ve noticed is that the number 3 honks never really happen on the highway. As long as slow folks like me stick to the slow lane, fast folks like you can zip around and dart all you like. No one’s bothered.

BUT… on one or two lane roads with lots of lights, the fury is exposed. Remarkably, the extra speed of those drivers around me rarely helps. Usually they just zip ahead so they can reach the red light first, then I coast up to them and have to deal with more of their rage.

So, if you happen to be one of those folks that honks at slow drivers, realize that we don’t intentionally mean to cause you grief. Try and understand that we prefer to live life without the rush and hustle and are hoping to save a few dollars here and there.

*disclaimer below
(more…)

Let’s suppose you owned a little puppy named Donald. Donald’s cute. Donald’s loveable. Donald’s comfortable. And Donald has been with you faithfully for 10 years and many miles.

One day, you find Donald suffering in the garage. You take him to the vet and find out he probably needs some transmission work. Replacing his filter and giving him lots of fluids doesn’t seem to help.

1) Do you take your favorite little dog to the vet and get an expensive surgery?
2) Do you agree that there’s probably just a bunch of illnesses down the road so you count your pennies and decide to let him rest in peace.
3) Or do you whip out your wrenches and your Haynes “How to repair Donald” book and trade punches with the Grim Reaper.

Comments/suggestions are welcome.

Something’s wrong with the Acclaim. she’s having a tough time switching from first into second gear. I checked the Transmission Fluid level this morning. no problem there… so, it looks like this weekend will be spent jacking up the Acclaim and exploring the Transmission. Galecki pointed out that the problem might be a clogged Transmission Fluid Filter, and car maintenance websites seem to agree that that is a possibility.

Thankfully, The Benchwarming White Whale of Nissan Justice should be registered by Saturday. So if the problem is more severe than a filter alone, extended downtime shouldn’t be a problem.

The Acclaim’s Thermostat is fixed.

The Acclaim’s Thermostat is broken.

The ‘backup car’ plan is moving forward! Provided all works out with the salvaged title information, I will be purchasing Jocelyn’s white ’97 Nissan Altima within the next month or so.

Don’t worry, this is not the end of the Acclaim to Fame. This second vehicle will serve as a means for me to do repairs on the Acclaim when she suffers without the stress of needing to borrow a car, or bum rides off my friends.

The problem is, I need a name for the new car. Something powerful and definitive like Kurt’s THE DIVA, Shaun McQuaid’s BLACKHOLE, or Sander’s THE CHARIOT. Something that works best when capitalized.

Right now I’m thinking THE DICTATOR.
or THE NISSAN ALTIMAMA. (THE ALTIMAMA for short)

other ideas include:
IRON WHEEL.
THE TITAN.
THE SCORPION.
STEEL JUSTICE.

your suggestions and comments are welcome!

I drove the acclaim to work today.

After a wild week last week, I was doing a final inspection of the Acclaim friday night when I noticed something unnerving. There was a huge leak in the brake lines. The kind of leak that made a mini-Niagra whenever the brake pedal was pressed. Being that I had a full weekend planned, I caved in and brought it to my favorite brake place. They were able to finish everything up by this morning and the acclaim was triumphant on the ride to work this morning.

I still need to do some clean up work. I wasn’t able to tighten a few of the bolts as much as I would like… and the oil needs changing. But I think the car will do just fine until the weekend. Heavens I love that car. Despite last week, she’s been so reliable for the 8 years that I’ve had the opportunity to drive her. I love that car.

11:30pm Thursday February 9th, 2006

The aching twist of a compressing spring cut through the quiet lull within the garage of disco as the Acclaim to Fame was lowered from her raised perch. After pushing tools aside and checking and rechecking connections, I rushed inside and gave JonAbad a tentative thumbs up.

mike d: we’re ready.
jonabad: we’re ready?
mike d: we’re ready.

JonAbad zipped up his mechanics suit and I grabbed the fire extinguishers. Jon threw on some safety goggles as we entered the garage. There she was. Not unlike some sort of mechanical aphrodite. I opened the garage door.

mike d: worst case scenario, the fuel line in the back comes undone and starts spraying gasoline everywhere… but I think we’ll be okay
jonabad: why’d you open the garage?
mike d: if the car errupts in flame, I’m going to try and coast her into the driveway so that we don’t burn down the garage.
jonabad: right.

I climbed into the drivers seat. I asked if JonAbad was ready. He stood, like a stormtrooper, fire extinguisher aimed and ready.

She started on the first try.

JonAbad started running around the car checking for leaks. I let her run for about 30 seconds then shut her off.

The process was repeated a second time. I wanted to drive her into the driveway, but a new problem became evident. The Parking Brake does not disengage.

I don’t think the parking brake problem will be a tough one to crack. But it made victory a little less sweet. Still, the acclaim runs. And will dominate the roadways once again.

The Acclaim is slowly coming together. Last night I successfully installed the new fuel pump… so now comes the super difficult task of putting the car back together. The problem lies in the fact that as I was removing the gas tank, the studs that hold the gas tank on snapped off.

tonight I will attempt to drill out or extract the busted studs and tap new holes for some fresh hardware. Then tomorrow I’ll reassemble the beast, lower her to the ground, get a friend or two to stand ready with a couple fire extinguishers, and I will start the car.

That’s the plan. we’ll see what really happens.

In other news…. Jon did some magical stuff with the website to speed it up. And i’ve made a new Acclaim to Fame catagory, as I suspect many more adventures in the future.

I love my car.