This weekend was packed with excitement. Friday’s class went pretty well. I’m pleased with the content so far. The class generated a really interesting debate about Gandhi, and the question of whether his influence would have been stronger had he had access to today’s technologies. It was a good time.

Saturday was full of all sorts of Kung Fu thrills, followed by some music and a turkey dinner at Tony and Paulette’s place. The gravy was amazing. He found the recipe off of an Emeril website. I’ll see if I can hunt it down and share it with everybody. After turkey, I went home and watched the 2005 action movie DOOM starring The Rock as Sarge.

The movie, if you’re not familiar, is based off of an early 90’s video game that helped popularize the idea of the ‘first person shooter’ genre. I have a few fond childhood Doom memories and my only disappointment with the movie was that it didn’t follow the story line very closely. I had heard it was beyond terrible. So, the fact that it passed as ‘watchable’ made it far exceed my expectations and I turned the movie off feeling pretty satisfied.

Finally, Sunday was studyrific. With the added bonus of some climbing and a visit of Caitlin’s place where I realized that someday I really want to have a Husky. What a beautiful dog!

We’ll end today’s post with a little humor. Thanks to Lindsay for passing this one on.

Dear Tech Support

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot of space and valuable resources. In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night 10.3, Football 5.0, Hunting and Fishing 7.5, and Racing 3.6 no longer run , crashing the system whenever selected.

I can’t seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my favorite applications. I’m thinking about going back to Girlfriend 7.0, but the uninstall doesn’t work on Wife 1.0. Please help!

A Troubled User.


Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING !!! It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Alimony – Child Support . I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the situation. I suggest installing the background application “Yes Dear” to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C: APOLOGIZE because ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5 and Do Bills 4.2

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 Once this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0.

WARNING!!! DO NOT , under any circumstances, install Secretary With Short Skirt 3.3 This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,
Tech Support

8 thoughts on “DOOM!

  • 3/5/2007 at 1:17 pm

    I thought you didn’t like dogs?

  • 3/5/2007 at 1:22 pm

    I know! At some point in the past three years my point of view changed dramatically on dogs.

    weird huh? at one point I was hated dogs with a passion. And then suddenly… they didn’t bother me in the least.

    I think Shaun McQuaid’s dog JUSTICE! may have changed my mind.

  • 3/5/2007 at 1:25 pm

    I have some vivid dog memories. I’m quite certain that my hatred of dogs developed when my family visited some people when I was a kid. They had a HUGE white dog that was larger than I was. I was running around the back of their house when it charged me and knocked me to the ground!

    Horrified I struggled to my feet and ran. I got around the corner, and the dog disappeared. I remember walking around toward the front of the house. scared out of my mind…

    Strange that I have changed my tune quite dramatically. no?

  • 3/5/2007 at 3:33 pm

    I am more amused by the fact that you had a frigtening encounter with a big white dog, and you want a husky. Yes i know huskies come in different colors but i guess i tend to think of them more as white due to my college mascot

  • 3/5/2007 at 3:37 pm

    yeah…Huskies are gorgeous animals.

  • 3/5/2007 at 4:08 pm

    But what about Kramer??? The lovable, huggable, giant Moose-dog???

    He certainly did love you last night! :-P

  • 3/6/2007 at 6:00 am

    I’m pretty sure something like that happened to me as a kid too. I have never liked dogs, and although I am now over my fear of them, I still don’t like them much. Cats are way cooler.


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