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When down fell the great gravedigger
Monstertruck engineers designed with vigor
How an you improve?
A monster that moves?
except to design it bigger.

My friend Sarah who I met at Alicia’s wedding has a writing club. I joined. This is my first contribution to the club.

The challenge was to write about a post-apocalypse world. We were asked to write about the government, the fallout, or whether people were happy or miserable in this world.

this is my entry:

When the lights dimmed and the high rises tumbled
We expected the world to break
But instead it’s really been pretty nice
Since our world was saved by cake.

You see, when order fell into chaos
No one knew what was going on
But the bakers? They compensated
With light fluffy filled chiffons

Nuclear fallout killed billions
Or so the newsmen report
But the bakers resisted radioactivity
with Kransekake and Sachertorte

And now much of the world is restricted
A modern day Fourth Zone
But the people are happy and joyful
overflowing with Panatone.

Now we can’t help but smile in joy
As we walk amongst heaps of debris
For this world is a far better place
With streets paved of Zwetschgendatschi.

Tom, Jerry, once pals,
But then came Ben, plan in hand:
Cat-flavored ice cream.

(from Patrick!)

First there was the mouse that mike d. caught
the first from our rodent zoo
When we opened the trap to let him free
he jumped away like a kangaroo

Then there was the mouse that Thomas caught
he had tempted it with cake
we drove a few miles to let him free
just south of Mirror Lake

Mouse #3 was caught in the morning
so we put him in a large blue bin
there were two when we came back later that night
#4 must have fallen in

Mouse #5 was caught by hand
while Thomas was on patrol
He was a baby mouse and was having trouble
jumping back into the mouse hole

Mouse #6 was caught the next day
and I think we can all agree
no one expected until the release
#6 knew how to climb trees

And now that Mouse #7 was caught
in our haveahart trapping device
The House of Rock is hopeful
that we are now free of mice.

I hear that bananas are running low
They’re becoming extinct in places they grow.
They are still yellow and yummy its true
But they have no seeds so what do we do?

I am sad because I love them a lot
They’re good when you’re running or when you’re not.
It’s not like they’re gone right now
But they’re more extinct than the brown cow

And more extinct than tomatos or limes
When they’re gone we’ll have such sad times.
The problem is that diseases all spread
From one sick banana to the entire banana bed

And soon from one country to another and more
An international crisis we cannot ignore
Let me say again that this point is not moot
Viruses are attacking our vulnerable fruit!

The banana is like a delicate flower
And bio technology has all the power
To breed the banana forever I hope
Then the monkeys and I will be able to cope.

June 14th: Flag Day.
a poem by mike d.

13 stripes and lots of stars
I think it’s made of polyester
it’s flown by southern red necks
and also by corporate investers
yes, our flag’s a colorful one
to that I proudly say “Amen!”
but if you’re traveling overseas
best to pretend you’re Canadian.

I found THIS via jefte’s site. And I love it. The poem, the music, everything. Jill wasn’t as impressed, and thought the repetitive animation was slightly distracting.

What do you think?

artful taste unmatched
oh sharp Vermont white cheddar
the Van Gogh of cheese

12.26.04
even the earth cried
shuddering on its axis
calm water no more

my friends, tonight I fixed my shower.

This is huge. HUGE. This was by far the worst shower I’ve ever had to endure. There was so little power that it took a miracle to properly clean yourself. It was less than a mist. it was a moving fog.

And because this mist was so weak, the water would be icy by the time it reached your skin. In order to clean myself with warm water I’d have to cup my hands over the shower head, let water accumulate, and then throw the handful of precious luke-warm water onto my dirty skin. This is not an exaggeration. I did this every morning.

Tonight I took that thing apart and fixed it. Now I have a jet stream of hot water pumping out of that shower head like a firehose. and I am happy.

here’s a haiku:

he’s a magic man
mike d, he fixed the shower
he’s got magic hands

I know a girl named Megan Ledger. Very fun outdoorsy kind of gal who doesn’t like escargo and loves peanut butter.

We went to Denmark together back in the day.

Recently, I realized that I too love peanut butter. It’s really delicious.
I don’t think I’d be as in love with peanut butter today if it weren’t for Megan Ledger.

this peanut butter sandwich is for you Megan.

.

haiku:

Peanut Butter? yes.
I do love its creamy taste
with bread or apples.

I, michael didonato, now own a gmail account: mikedidonato@gmail.com

thanks to Jon Abad for hooking me up.
three haikus for jonabad:

Jon Abad the dude
gave some G-mail to mike d.
fellow mike’n'ike

For this selfless act
the halo gods will reward
head-shots and pow’r-ups

raise your needlers high
and warthog it back to base
’cause this flag’s for him.

There’s a brand spankin’ new IKEA opening up today not 1 mile from my apt. This afternoon post-work I’m going to attack the store armed with a gift certificate from my sister. This is really a monumental event as I have never before participated in the IKEA experience.

I’m not quite sure what I’m going to buy, or if the purchase will be made today. But… I will get something. and it WILL be exciting.

4 IKEA haikus:

Oh, IKEA oh
how I long for your sweet sales
cheap wholesale products

When I need some stuff
And I want to buy it cheap
‘I’ ‘K’ ‘E’ ‘A’ please

I expect a crowd
at today’s grand opening
I want IKEA

Sweedish retail chain
For ‘merican consumers
Lots of wealthy blondes