A conversation

While out to eat with a few of the managers at work, I ordered a chicken ceaser wrap. The other guys ordered Reuben’s and Burgers.

When we got back to the office, I was paged by one of said managers. I entered his office.

mike d: What can I do for you?
Co-worker1: Well, first we need to talk about the chicken ceaser wrap.
mike d: It was delicious.
Co-worker1: It’s not a real meal.
mike d: what?
Co-worker1: If you’re going to be in our business you’ll probably want to order lunch with meat in it.
mike d: Chicken is meat.
Co-worker1: You need to eat red meat.
Co-worker2: Something that bleeds.

Thankfully, I was able to redeem myself by discussing Texan BBQ.

Phone call


mike d: hey Schenk!
Ryan: hey mike d!
mike d: what’s going on?
Ryan: I have a question for you.
mike d: okay.
Ryan: What time do you go to the dentist?
mike d: huh?
Ryan: What time do you go to the dentist?
mike d: me personally? I dunno. Usually either first thing in the morning or later in the afternoon.
Ryan: NOPE! you go at TOOTHIRTY!

Office Supplies

Sander: hey dude, you got a nice pair of scissors over there?
mike d: nope. sorry man.
Sander: what happened to the pair with flames on them?
mike d: I haven’t put a clear coat on them yet.
Sander: ahh.


Sander: “i haven’t put a clear coat on them yet.” what a ridiculous response to a question asking for scissors.

random conversation

we pass a sign on the highway that says “gaylord rehab center”

mike d: Would you rather be a gay lord, or a straight peon.
Jesse: By gay lord do you mean homosexual lord? or lord of homosexuals.
mike d: we’ll say both.
Jesse: hmm.


Jesse: I think I’d prefer to be the Gay Lord, because then I could make Man dates.