Dad D.
My dad has a lot of good stories. Here’s one of them.
When I was a kid we used to play in the woods a lot. One day, there were about eight of us climbing a big tree. And the last one climbing up stepped on a bee hive. He climbed super fast up the rest of that tree.
So there we were. All eight of us high up in the tree, with a swarm of bees circling at the bottom. Two of the braver kids climbed up all the way to the top, and the tree bent way over… and landed the two kids in a brayer patch. They got all cut up. The rest of us didn’t know what to do. So we climbed down through the bee swarm.
Those bees stung the bajeezus out of us. My mom was so angry! When I got home she put me in a tub of ice cold water.
When asked why he didn’t roll on the ground or jump in water once the bees started stinging, my dad replied with some fatherly wisdom:
It’s hard to think rationally when you’re covered with bees.
This is a perfect oppurtunity to quote Eddie Izzard:
“My father was a bee-keeper, my grandfather was a bee-keeper, and his father and grandfather were bee-keepers. I want to follow in their footsteps. And their footsteps went like this - AAAAHHHH I’M COVERED IN BEEESSS” *runs across stage, flailing arms*
I heard that zig zagging is the best way to escape a swarm of bees. Source: Maxim magazine… obviously.
surprised that I discovered your blog? Now imagine me discreetly disappearing in a crowd of people…… eerie
why hello! I’m not too surprised you discovered the blog. Especially since ALL the cool kids are reading it these days.
Feel free to post more Maxim Magazine words of wisdom in the future
rock on.
aw! you should make stories from Dad D. a regular feature!!!